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A Powerful Leadership Skill:
Listening Aggressively

Podcast #27 Listening Aggressively Show Notes

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Show Notes:

Overview of Episode #27. The following topics are covered: 

Timing on Recording: @  2:10 ---

Topic 1: Avoiding to Acknowledging

  • My story - avoiding Debbie Downer
  • My Definition for Listening Aggressively: A focus on hearing in a determined and energetic way.  When you are doing this well, you demonstrate your desire  to understand by asking questions and listening with NO agenda other than to understand.  Action Steps:  Reflect, Probe, Support, Advise.
  • Why You Should Never Tell Someone to Relax
Walter - 4 month old Shih-Poo
Oscar - 13 year old - Shih-Poo

Timing on Recording: @  17:45 ---

Topic 2:  Beliefs, Mindset and Habits of Great Listeners

  •  Gallup Research
  • Tune in Time - 15 minutes a day
  • "I seek to understand others first, before I try to get them to understand my view. THIS is crucial to all relationships and the level of trust and respect we have with each other."
  • "Words alone don’t teach, life experience teaches. What I say needs to be clear, but people need to experience things for themselves to really know, understand and accept."
  • "My example is my strongest message."
  • "My way is not the only way, it’s just 'A' way.  I am the Leader but I invite participation,  new ideas and new ways of doing what we do."
  • "I try to look at and focus upon the best attributes in others.  Even in difficult and tense situations, I can discuss negative facts and behaviors, and still value the person."
  • "I always expect the best from others."

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Timing on Recording: @ 21:45 ---

Topic 3: Four Listening Aggressively Steps - R.P.S.A.  and "the Nail" video

  • STEP #1: R. Reflect - Is to: Verify and Clarify.  
  • STEP #2: P. Probe - Is to: Ask Clarifying Questions to Understand.“Do you mind if we ask a few questions, we’d love to get your thoughts...” “What did you think about...?” “Help me understand what’s…
  • STEP #3:  S. Supporting - Is to: Demonstrate Understanding. You can show understanding even if you disagree. You can almost always sincerely gain a true understanding of the other person's viewpoint IF you've done Steps 1 & 2-Relect & Probe, well. If you’ve been sincere in expressing your understanding you can then, successfully and safely, move to the next step.
  • STEP #4: A. Advising - Is to: Provide Facts & Make a Recommendation.
  • It Not about the Nail - video
  • Charismatic Leadership - Article on Listening Aggressively

Timing on Recording: @ 38:00   ---

Topic 4: Six Negative Listening Habits and Two Favorite Quotes

  • 1.Faker
  • 2.The Interrupter
  • 3.The Happy Hooker        
  • 4.The Advice Giver
  • 5.Rebuttal-Maker
  • 6.The Intellectual or Logical Listener
  • PDF on Negative Listening Habits and Four Stes in  Listening Aggressively      
  •  "The first duty of love is to listen."  Paul Tillich, German Philosopher
  • "The greatest compliment that was ever paid me was when one asked me what I thought, and attended to my answer." Henry David Thoreau

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