Suzie Price tells a story from her own experience to illustrate the habit that's hard to break.
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Rhonda's face was red, her jaw clenched, as she angrily walked toward the wedding chapel. Walking sheepishly behind her was my new-father-in-law-to-be Jessie. It was September 6, 1997 and my wedding day. Jessie was recovering from triple by-pass surgery. He'd promised to quit smoking, until that afternoon, everyone thought he had. He told us that he meant to quit and that he knew he should quit. Jessie's challenge is not unique - I see people struggle every day to change communication and work habits that are hurting their career and life success. Often the change is not life-threatening, but most struggle to create new habits just the same. |
There's a scientific reason that explains why this struggle occurs - its not that people are lazy or belligerent. The scientific reason change is hard is that in order to change we must develop new neural pathways in our brain in order for a new habit to be formed and for change in behavior to occur.
Knowing this should change the way we train and lead others - if you want new habits you must think of developing new neural pathways - we must have a habit mindset.
Here are the Four Secrets to creating new Neural Pathways, which lead to the Habit Mindset
- Provide a step-by-step structure, process or program that includes 'how to' steps. (You can't just tell a manager or a sale rep to "listen more" and expect that a new habit will replace the old - provide a structure - for example our Listening Aggressively steps - RPSA.)
- Provide practice during and after class. Some things you can do include:
• Real-life role plays in class
• Post class call check-ins
• Post class lunch and learns - Provide continuous feedback on progress. Ongoing feedback can be provided by:
• Measuring progress with online surveys
• Teaching company managers how to coach and how to effectively reinforce training - Hold people accountable for the change - measure progress (see online measurement #3). Describe the end goal and time frame specifically - and follow up.
Help the people you love and/or are leading - if they're struggling to change habits that are not serving them - don't assume that they're just belligerent or lazy. While we always keep in mind that ultimately people are individually responsible for their lives, for making changes and developing new habits, but you can use your influence to assist in the change process.
As their mentor/leader you can provide an environment that will help them develop the habit mindset by using these four secrets.
Suzie's PostScript:
I just talked to my father-in-law Jessie this morning. Even ten-plus years after our wedding day, the extra support is always worth it.
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"There's a huge difference between conceptual learning and mastering a new skill. Dr. Denny Coates, Train-To-Ingrain Guidebook |
